My Soul Finds Rest in God Alone

I have been a bit flat on my feet lately in my spiritual walk. I realized about a week ago I had put other persons and other things as a higher priority than God. I know…I know…how could I let this happen. But it did and God had to wrap me upside my head…shake me up a bit…allow me to have a pity party and wallow in my tears for a while. And now, well, I think I’m on the upswing of an attitude check God ordained.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I didn’t just walk away from God. I mean…I still prayed, read his Word (occasionally when time allotted), and tried to walk a Christ like life, but it’s hard to live this Christian life if Christ is not the center. I had Jesus way over to the left I think…somewhere…and my eyes could not see Him in front of me because I had left the starting gate without Him.

Since my discovery of senseless living, I have sorrowfully…on my knees…asked my Savior for forgiveness.  In my many conversations with the Lord after this moment, I realize just how much I have missed Him and the peace He alone can give a God chaser heart. Life is better with Him rather than dismal attempts to go it alone. If I could only just remember, I was made by God for God. Not by God to fulfill my desires. So I’m taking the time to seek His face and not His hand. I want His love, grace, and mercy to soak the deepest parts of my soul, because only in Him will my soul find rest as I walk this journey called life. So I leave you with this scripture…

Psalm 61

¹ Truly my soul finds rest in God;
my salvation comes from him.
² Truly he is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

³ How long will you assault me?
Would all of you throw me down—
this leaning wall, this tottering fence?
⁴ Surely they intend to topple me
from my lofty place;
they take delight in lies.
With their mouths they bless,
but in their hearts they curse.^[b]

⁵ Yes, my soul, find rest in God;
my hope comes from him.
⁶ Truly he is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
⁷ My salvation and my honor depend on God^[c];
he is my mighty rock, my refuge.
⁸ Trust in him at all times, you people;
pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge.

⁹ Surely the lowborn are but a breath,
the highborn are but a lie.
If weighed on a balance, they are nothing;
together they are only a breath.
¹⁰ Do not trust in extortion
or put vain hope in stolen goods;
though your riches increase,
do not set your heart on them.

¹¹ One thing God has spoken,
two things I have heard:
“Power belongs to you, God,
¹² and with you, Lord, is unfailing love”;
and, “You reward everyone

according to what they have done.”

Amy Sockaci

Every once in awhile I check out my hometown newspaper on-line and get caught up on stories and people from where I grew up. I check the front page first and next move to the obituaries. I know it sounds morbid, but it’s at the top of the list under “your news” and then I proceed to births, engagements, and marriages. But today I never made it past the obituaries.

 My breath was taken away at the sight of a beautiful 2 year old blonde girl who died. It didn’t say how she died, but when her obituary was followed by her 34 year old father, I came to know it was a horrific, car accident. The mother was also in the car, but survived with only a concussion. How tragic as tears swelled in my eyes and I wondered how the mother could deal with such grief. I prayed for her instantly even though I don’t know her.

But the obituary that made me think the most was this one of Amy Sockaci, a young woman

only 32 years old. It was her smile that drew me to read the full obituary. I urge each one of you to “click” on her name and also read it and think…really think about what is said. And then when you finish reading it you should go here, architectureamy.blogspot.com , and read her last post on July 7^th, 2011.

You never know when your last day on this earth will be. I hope it makes you think about life as much as it made me today!

Dear Heavenly Father, please help us all to realize that life is short and we need to make the most of each day living to glorify you! Help us all to give one more hug, one more kiss, and say one more "I love you"...to our family and friends. For we know not the hour which you will call us or a loved one home.

~Amen 

My Prayer Tonight

I love you Lord and I hope you know how much I love you. Some may think it silly and futile that I put so much weight and worth in one single man who I refer to as my first love and my best friend. And even though I have been a bit mad at you lately, I still remain your child…whom you love endlessly… despite my faults, sins, and imperfections. I am thankful for this love for without it, I would have never known its true meaning.  

I’ve been sad lately. My heart aches for so many different reasons …oh yeah…I forgot…you already know everything. But I don’t understand and I’m trying real hard to just trust you. I know it may not seem like it when I try to fix things or want an answer now and not wait for you to reveal your perfect plan. And the voices that tell me I’m not worth much, I’m no good, no one likes me, you’ll never be anything…Lord please take them away and remind me always that I am somebody because I am your child hand made by you.

I am lonely. ..lonely because of my own hang ups…I don’t trust others well because of all that stuff that happened when I was younger…oh yeah…I forgot…you already know. I know you gave me the mom and dad I have because you needed traits from both of them to make the person you made in me to do the work you prepared in advance for me to do. But I’m tired of trying to figure it all out. Do you think you could just help me find some rest? Please lead me back to your faithful arms and embrace me with your nail pierced hands that I might smell the sweet scent of your robe and smile once again.

I know your Word tells me that you make all things beautiful in your time…so help me be patient and wait on you. In the mean time, let me thirst for your Word and enjoy quiet moments with you as you begin to heal my hurt heart. Thank you my faithful friend and Father.

Love,

Your beloved daughter,

Shannon

Healing Rain

I was out on a walk this morning.  The sky was not the clearest as rain clouds hovered overhead and the sun refused to shine, but it was one of the most refreshing walks I have had in a great while. The air was slightly cool and half way through my paced footsteps a lazy rain began to fall. The drops were gentle upon my skin. There was no way I could avoid even one drop from the air and with each tap of the rain I was reminded of God’s awesome presence in my life.

Life can throw us unexpected curve balls. Where we thought we were going to be doesn’t seem to be where we end up. It is unsettling at best for a planner like me who thrives on order and not chaos. But God is funny; he likes to shuffle the deck of cards so we don’t get to comfortable in one spot and he throws us out there on the table seemingly all alone. But really we are never alone and just like those raindrops we cannot avoid his presence, power, and lavish love. He puts us out there sometimes because He misses us and needs to pull us away from the unimportant tasks of “doing” to just simply “being” with him. He longs to love us and to hear our voice speak to him…the voice he created.

“He must become greater; I must become less.”

~John 3:30

When the Rooster Crows

God is up to something…He always is up to something, but for some reason in the midst of the doings of everyday life I feel as though I can see him weave meticulously the direction of my life. It wouldn’t be obvious to some, but to others with the intent on a day to day basis to see God smile and cry…I sense his sweet nudge to press on.

I have had too many “roosters crowing” in my ear. You remember the story…Peter denies Jesus thrice and the rooster crows. I am sure well after the famous incident in which Peter wept bitterly over, every time he heard a rooster crow thereafter, he was reminded of his sin. And I am sure like all humans; he felt shameful once again…beat himself up again…and wondered why he did such a thing…again. Does this sound familiar? This guilt is nothing but Satan…the father of lies…as he tries to convince us we are no good and despicable unworthy souls. It’s one of his best tools to make us drop our heads in shame and feel as though we cannot do the work of God set before us. But remember…

Greater is He that is in me than He that is in the world…

                                                         ~I John 4:4

In this world you will have trouble

But take heart…Christ has overcome the world!

                             ~John 16:33

When you hear the rooster crow and it tells you you’re insignificant, no good, unable, and unworthy…speak these scriptures out loud and be ye thankful unto the Lord. Christ alone will take the negative away and fill your cup with joy and love. And don’t take for granted those God has placed in your life…it is not by accident…not by chance…but his intent to use these God chasers to help you along your journey. Never go it alone!  

Dear Heavenly Father,

I come to you today and ask that anyone who has read this and is struggling

 within in their mind that you would make things clear for them.

 Help them to realize just how special they are to you.

After all, you breathed them into life and care more for them than anyone else.

Lord, please let them take the time to sit awhile with you in prayer and reading your Word…

let them thirst and hunger for you like never before.

 I ask that you fill their cup this day with your peace and grace so they might know they are loved by the mighty and great I AM!

~Amen

Held

When is the sacred torn from your life? Maybe for some this statement might mean the loss of a child. Maybe to others a divorce you didn’t expect and yet others maybe a chronic health issue that keeps you from being what you once were. It’s like a thorn pushed deep within your flesh and just when you think you have learned to walk with that depth of pain…something or someone comes along and hits the thorn causing greater anguish and reminding us how human we are and just how much we need Jesus.

Sometimes for me the thorn embeds so deeply within my heart…it seems permanent…irremovable…and everlasting. The grief is overwhelming and the desperation leaves my mind spinning as I wonder how I overcome the pain.

And then it happens…

somewhere in the midst of the fog which forbids me to see my own hand in front of me…

out of nowhere…

I feel His amazing touch.

It is unmistakable, warm, and lovely in every way.

And soon even though I can’t see my hand I see his nail pierced palm, as his finger which made the very stars I see in the night sky, wipe my fragile tears away. He soothes my sadden soul and bids me to come close and sit awhile with Him. He hums familiar hymns like Amazing Grace and soon I hear the words whispered gentle in perfect pitch. My forever friend…Jesus… comforts me like none other. He never…never…never…turns away from me. He stays right by my side, down in the trenches of my wretched sin with his hand outstretched just waiting…waiting to hold me in his loving arms. This is how I know what it is like to be held…to be loved unconditionally…and know my Jehovah-Shalom…the Lord of my Peace.

Thank you my best friend and first love…your beloved daughter Shannon!

Heaven...I Can Only Imagine ~ MercyMe w/ London Symphony Orchestra

I love to dream about heaven. It brings such peace to my soul as I let my imagination roar as a lion. Heaven will be all the sweet things that I see…rainbows, butterflies, the smiles of my children, blue skies, sun, birds, the array of beautiful colors seen in the flowers, and the dew upon the grass. Heaven will be all the sweet things I smell…apple pie baking in the oven, the fragrance of a fresh rain, the lilacs in bloom, my children as babies, and the unique smell of grandmas home. Heaven will be all the sweet things I touch…holding my child’s hand, the kiss of my husband’s lips upon mine, the hug between family and friends, the wind felt on my face, the sand between my toes. Heaven will be all the sweet things I hear…birds singing, my children laughing, the breeze fluttering the leaves, the rhythm of the ocean breaking onto the shore, and music of any kind. Heaven is the taste of all I love…chocolate, pizza, fine wine, homemade ice tea, and of course coffee!

All these things I am sure will be in heaven, yet heaven will also be so much more. Peace will abound and sorrow will be extinct. The only tears I think you will see are those of pure joy. The music will be absolutely outstanding. I hope to talk with those I have only read about like John, Paul, Peter, and Esther. I will see those I have missed so dearly…my grandma Bowser and many more. It will be fellowship, celebration, and jubilant hearts. The souls of all who enter His gates will be so full of praise for the one and only…Jesus! The streets of gold will shine, but I can’t wait to walk the winding river and sit under the tree of life and bask in the presence of His holiness. But the one thing I long for most is to meet my best friend Jesus and clean His feet with the tears of joy from my eyes and dry them with the locks of my hair. I hope He knows just how much I love Him and long to see Him! Yes, heaven is the place a long to be. It will be my final home forever more!

Let Freedom Ring - July Front Porch

Just Give Me Jesus

The question I ask myself as of late…

“Can I see the reflection of myself within the gaze of my Father’s eyes?”

Maybe this might seem like an odd question because really who actually sees Jesus…face to face…and behold the Son of God? I would gander to say probably not many and I would think this a rare occurrence which God does not permit on a daily basis. But then again…maybe I’m wrong. Maybe God does let us see his Son face to face but we are to busy “doing” and we miss His gaze upon us, His smiles, and maybe even the touch of His finger tap upon our shoulder. We have our agenda planned and in order to feel accomplished we need to get it done.

I think maybe the Holy Spirit has placed this question upon my heart. It’s a conversation within me that goes something like this…

“Shannon…sit awhile…be calm…rest in the Great I am. Don’t be so busy and plan your day. What if you just don’t plan anything and see what God has planned for you today? You never know where He’s going to take you. Think of it as a grand walk in the park with Christ. It will be just you and Him with your hand within His nail pierced palm. You will see so much more than if you walk alone. You will gaze upon the flowers…and He will have all your favorites to view…the fragrance will sing of His love and grace. And maybe He will choose to add some friends that He just knows you will fill with hope and cheer. But maybe Jesus just wants your hands to toil not for your own gratitude, but in rhythm with His making a nice meal for a family. The possibilities are endless and the breath of life unto your soul refreshing.”

Just give me Jesus. He is all I need!

Lord Jesus, please help me this day to just bask in your love. Allow my mind to think of you every moment of this day. I want you to be a part of everything I do. I don’t want to leave you at the front door step waving goodbye and sad because I once again forgot about you. All the while you never leave me and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your endless love for this sinner’s soul! I just want you to know how precious you are to me and I am sorry if I have hurt your feelings by choosing to go it alone. I need you Jesus!

 Amen.

7 x 70

I rested my eyes upon the Old Victorian for the last time. I will never return until the day my father is called home. The once pristine house full of character and charm is nothing but a shell of old brittle bones. It was a very sad site for my eyes to behold, but sadder yet the true reality of a person who grieves the precious Holy Spirit. I am afraid for my dad who will not heed to the reigns of the Spirit and makes me question if he indeed truly received Jesus as Lord of his life. I walked away angry, ashamed, and with ultimatums posed to my dad from his only daughter he once called “sweetie pie”. My heart is so sad and I wonder how much more my heart must endure the lies and untruths. I am tired and full of grief. I ask my God, “Why?” But I know the answer only will be found in one word…forgive…again. God will pick up my heart again and lift my feet from the ground and dance with me and hold me close for awhile. I will be o.k…this I know because my Abba has promised me. But if you read this, I just ask that you would please say a short prayer for my dad. I know God does answer prayer and weeps with me on behalf of my dad.