Friday, October 15, 2010

Our Daughter - Ruthie's Victory

I’m just overwhelmed to gigantic proportions by just how much my Lord loves me. I am his beloved daughter whom he loves deeply with an everlasting love. He always meets me right where I am at on any given day. It is the greatest comfort one can have…knowing your Father is always there for you. He is an ever present help in times of trouble…my grandma would quote to me in her beautiful hand written letters.

I needed Him yesterday. But He knew I would need Him before I ever did. I didn’t have to run to Him. He was already with me. My precious daughter needed Him even more than I. I was separated from her and couldn’t seem to get to the school fast enough to just be there for her. Some of you know God's Ruthie is Autistic. She was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome which is a high functioning form of Autism. She suffered a dramatic meltdown yesterday morning.

She is so beautiful to me in every way. I know it sounds silly, but I wouldn’t take away the Autism because it actually makes Ruthie who she is…a joyful, fun, loving girl. God gave me Ruthie. He knew I was just the right mom for her. But He also knew Ruth was just the right daughter for me. I have probably learned more from her than she has from her mother.

As I drove that endless three miles to her school, thinking I just needed to get there…God reminded me. Ruth is my daughter first before she ever became your daughter. It wasn’t an audible voice, but just a thought in my own mind. And then one thought turned into another…I love her even more than you. And then that thought became another…I am already with her.

By the time I got to the school, tears of epic proportions would not stop flowing from my eyes. I took several deep breaths, wiped the tears, and powdered my face in the rear view mirror.

“Help me God.” I whispered gently under my breath and walked into the school.

The tears never did cease and I didn’t speak much. I tried, but I just needed to have my daughter back in my arms again. But you know what…God already had her deep between the hems of His robe. Ruth is His beloved daughter whom He loves deeply with an everlasting love! He met her right where she was at yesterday. His comfort was better than any comfort I could offer. He was an ever present help to Ruth in her time of need! I thank my God for loving our daughter!

1 comment:

Sarah R said...

Your post made me cry. I too, am the mother of a high functioning Asperger's child. And I've always felt the same, that taking away the autistic qualities would take away from what makes my son unique and wonderful. I spend a lot of time driving to the school, too. :D
I'm so glad the Lord chose my kiddo to be my son, and that I get to be his mama. I am so blessed.